Friday, April 22, 2011

Sexless in Seattle?

The weather isn't the only thing dreary this month--Seattle is currently in the midst of a big ol' dry spell. Yep, I said it. Sexless in Seattle should be our new slogan. While I may lack scientific proof of my assertion, I have enough data to tell me that the locals aren't getting much action these days. My unscientific proof:

1. My friends are all in dry spells. The recent chat with girlfriends is extremely, well, rated-G. Our sig. others? Well, they would rather play "Angry Birds" on their iPhone in bed. We got no game!

2. The shop (Bellefleur) is Slow (with a capital S). Around comes April every year, and the sexy-lingerie sales dry up. What are we selling? T-shirt bras. Nude stuff. No matching sets. No garter belts. Nope, just the basics. No spring lovin' round these parts!

I have a couple theories as to why this happens each year in April. Maybe it is "tax season" stressing us all out? Something about a looming deadline takes the fun out of spontaneous sexy-time. Or the completely bi-polar and unreliable weather that throws us from depression and pulling out our vitamin D drops to downright hysteria when the sun comes out. Should I wear flip-flops or my puffy coat? Or both? Sigh...

Regardless of the reasons WHY we are in a down cycle in the boudoir, we are. Normally I would suggest a hot bath, a hotter date, and some smokin' lingerie--but I have to be honest, my mojo is on vacation until May 1. And let me tell you, May can not get here soon enough!

So just chill, and know that it's okay to spend an extra 20 minutes brushing your teeth, hoping he falls asleep. And don't worry if he decides to stay up watching a 3 year old re-run of Mythbusters instead of coming to bed with you. Enjoy your down time, and I will see you next month!


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